Facing Your Insecurities and Finding The Light | The RAS Project 054
Are you allowing insecurities to dictate the course of your journey? Insecurities are things a lot of people face. It’s nothing uncommon by any means. Yet, many people never take any action in trying to rectify their own insecurities. In this episode, I chat with my Special Guest Corey Berrier about his own insecurities and how he overcame them.
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Ivan Temelkov [00:15]
What’s up everyone? You’re listening to The RAS project. My name is Ivan Temelkov and I’m your host. On this podcast we discuss entrepreneurship, personal development, family, tech and marketing. Why in the fuck should you listen to this podcast? This podcast is for those of you who are looking for life changing advice and ways to thrive digitally with your business. As always, all content is 100% real, raw and unfiltered.
Today on the show I have another special guest someone that I’ve been friends with on social media for a while. His name is Corey Berrier and Corey is a guy from Mayberry that has beat an alcohol and drug addiction for over 10 years. He is coaching hundreds of people.
Has coached hundreds of people, lots of them who have been in the fitness industry and is currently coaching via zoom. Which is what it sounds like a lot of people are doing. Being on Zoom. He’s also the host of the successful life. podcast. Corey, what’s going on, man? What’s up, Ivan? How are you, brother? I’m good. I’m good. Hey, thanks for jumping on and jamming with me. You know, we’ve been friends for a little while on social media never really got a chance to, you know, sit down and talk about what’s happening in Corey’s world.
So, you know, let’s kick it off with you know, let’s spend the next couple of minutes tell us about, okay, drug addiction, alcohol addiction coaching people. You know what, tell us a little bit about your story.
Corey Berrier [01:45]
A lot going on there. Well, first of all, thank you for having me. I really, really appreciate that and the opportunity to share with people and hopefully that we’ll touch some people today. Um, but Ivan my story started in. You know, I grew up in Mayberry. I literally like the Andy Griffith Show “Mayberry”. You know? I didn’t grow up. I didn’t have a rough life.
I grew up on a golf course. I grew up in the nicest neighborhood in the, in the city. Um, But we weren’t. We weren’t the wealthiest by any stretch. And so, the reason I point that out I’ve been is because I think there was a level of insecurity that came along with that because I did live amongst all the attorneys and doctors and, you know, people that made a shit ton of money and my family did well, but they didn’t do it.
They didn’t. They weren’t doctors and attorneys and entrepreneurs, they were they worked at a job. Um, so I think some insecurity came along with that to be honest with you and, and in in one of the one of the biggest things that I remember is I was in sixth grade. Um, and this is what kind of started me on my journey. Ivan. I was I was a fat kid, I was, I was a fat kid and I was at a pool and I had some girls making fun of me, which I didn’t realize that was going on at the time.
And when they asked me if I needed a bra, I decided that it was time for a change is probably one of the most humiliating moments in my life. So but that that drove me to get thin and to get skinny and to not, you know, just take care of myself and to not continue piling in all the sugar and everything else, which is kind of what started me on my health and fitness journey, you know.
So I so going into seventh grade, I had lost lost the weight I’d grown some I’d start exercising things were looking good, but the confidence still wasn’t totally there. Um, and I don’t know why that was. I just was I don’t know, I don’t know if it stemmed from an early age. I’m sure it did because it’s programming right? So, moving on from there went high school I almost didn’t graduate because of a numerous amounts of stuff. Um, but I did.
And that’s when I start, that’s when my drinking really picked up Ivan. Um, and I started drinking, I would say around 16 when I was actually I guess it started before. Before they before I graduated, but long story short, I started drinking really heavily. I got a DUI, I got another DUI by the same cop within 30 days in the same city. On the day, I was supposed to go to coma day I was supposed to go to the court. So he knew who I was when he opened the door.
And I wasn’t in court, by the way. Um, and so by that point, I was, you know, using cocaine, and B Using cocaine obviously pills, marijuana was never really that big of a deal to me. But everything else, you know, ecstasy and all that good stuff. Until and, and and leading up to this I had I’m sorry. So I get out of out of place here. So all right. So when the drugs led me to selling cocaine in 2001 less drugs actually led me to Las Vegas then led me to selling really selling like a guy.
I met a guy in a bar, who worked in the same bar that I did and he moved and he handed me his cocaine dealer and his all of his list of clients. So it was really it was like a it was literally like a paycheck. Because you’re ahead, you know, the guy, the guy that I needed to know I had the list of people who wanted the stuff from the guy and I just happen to be the middle guy.
Well, that worked out for years. And I made a shit ton of money doing it. However, um, that day came to an end in 2005 I got caught, which, you know, everybody thinks, no matter what you’re doing, if it’s illegal, you think I’m not going to get called. It’s not gonna happen to me, whatever. And that was me. That was totally me. I absolutely thought it wasn’t gonna happen to me. Um, and so, in 2005 when I got busted, I lost everything and had to rebuild.
I’ve been through two marriages since then I’m on my third and I’m happy as fuck love. I love my wife. She’s great. You know, maybe Third time’s a charm for me anyway. Yeah, um, so so I got sober in 2009 And I’ve been sober ever since. And what that’s done for me, Ivan, it’s interesting. I have a different take than anybody else probably that you’re going to speak to that it’s ever attended a meeting I attended a for a long time, I’ve been booked what I what I realized at eight and a half years sober.
When I started my personal development journey is that I was saying I am an alcoholic every time I’m there. I am an alcoholic. And I’m like, this doesn’t this doesn’t make sense. This doesn’t this does not. This is not how it’s supposed to be because, you know, just like I know. I am the two most powerful words in the whole English dictionary.
Right? So what do you think, Ivan? I’m gonna have to ask you what do you think that does to a person when they stand up and say I I’m an alcoholic? Over And over and over and over and over.
Ivan Temelkov [08:03]
Well, you’re, you’re putting blame on yourself continuously, obviously, you know, by saying that because and also in part, I think, from a mental standpoint, you keep playing the victim card by saying I am I am. I am. I am because, you know, as you were talking about your story, actually ensuring a little bit of it. There’s some irony in that because you started off with insecurities.
And I’m a person that comes from a background of insecurities. You know, I’m an Eastern European, my family immigrated here, I was bullied all through high school. I barely graduated high school, in fact, the handling my diploma, I dropped out of college and I had insecurities for all four years through high school. Because I was the kid that was bullied.
I was the kid that was kicked on the bus, pushed off the bus kid who said by himself for four years old through high school at lunch, talking about loneliness, right? Talk about self esteem problems. And even though drugs weren’t in the picture and mind you, you know, my father, an entrepreneur had his first business back in 1994 when I was 14 years old. And so, but the insecurities were there.
Also, I was insecure because I was so worried about what society thought about me the perception I was creating. It wasn’t because I was stupid, because I was incapable that was incoherent. It was that I was so worried about judgment from the outside world. always worried about Am I good enough? Am I smart enough? Am I good? Looking enough? Am I wealthy enough and not actually carried into my 20s? So you were talking about insecurities.
And I think that you know, with entrepreneurship, because there’s a lot of entrepreneurs that listen to the show. There’s a lot of insecurities, also, because a lot of people question all those things. And so you when you were talking about AI and kind of, you know, taking that and blowing it out is on a tangent sort of speak. It does create insecurities because you’re constantly putting blame on yourself. And I used to do that. In fact, sometimes I still do it.
But I’m more conscious about it when I do that, because I catch myself and you know what? Then I realized as opposed to when I was younger, now I realized, you know what, that’s fucking bullshit. I’ve got 365 days, 24 hours in a day to do whatever the fuck I want to do. And society is going to be the last person in my life in my world that’s going to tell me what I should do and what I shouldn’t do. And so, changing that mentality, you know, has taken years so when you were talking about insecurities, and and self esteem and conscience, I’ve gone through something similar like that, in fact.
One of the reasons why the rise project exists is because it was intended to be 100% real and raw and unfiltered, to bring on people like yourself to talk about their stories to share with the world. Because you know what, I don’t give two fucks about how much how much money you made, or how wealthy your businesses, what I give a fuck about is Tell me about your story. Tell me how I can relate to you if I can, if there’s similar interests, that’s exactly at the core of The RAS Project. So it was really ironic when you were talking about some of these things that kind of brings flashbacks of my past, you know, cuz, yeah, I mean, like back in high school, I remember like, the first time I took on my first joint, and it was like, it was an alleviation of emotional pain is what it was, I didn’t impart because of curiosity, but also larger did it because of self, Susan.
To create insight, comfort within myself and honestly, I will tell you this now being Fuck, I just turned 40 years old in January and I feel like my life has just started to be honest with you. You know, I’m a father. And yes, I’m divorced once to, you know, in fact, it’s the one of the best things that has happened to me because I wouldn’t be where I’m at today. And that’s just said is that, you know, growing up, I also wasn’t very religious, you know, but, you know, through probably the last five to seven years, God has played a huge part in my life. I mean, I have two beautiful children.
Because of that, my son just turned four and my daughter is going to be three years old in June. You know, I’m married to a woman that accepts me for everything that I am, accepts me for my goods, and my Bad’s, which is, let’s face it, when you live in a fucking country where the divorce rate exceeds 70% it’s hard to find someone who’s going to put up with You’re bullshit.
Corey Berrier [13:01]
That’s the truth.
Ivan Temelkov [13:02]
And so a lot of the things that you were saying I wanted to expand upon because there’s a lot of people out there, especially entrepreneurs, and you know now being in this for, well, shit, probably five, six years all in into this I’ve come to realize that mindset, personal development, mind, body and soul are the three key things that you need to have as an integral part of your life. It’s your mind is important, because the way you think, the way you act, the way you perceive things will change everything in your life and in your business.
Your body is, as cliche as it sounds. I’m sure you heard this is that it’s a sanctuary. It really is, is you got to take yourself so for instance, six years ago, I started cycling, and to this day, I have no fucking idea how that even came about. Because I don’t know any Europeans that cycle, okay? Like I just don’t fucking know any Eastern Europeans that cycle into this day which by the way you’re gonna see this soon in my social feeds as soon as like next couple months it’s gonna be flooded with map my ride posts of the last 14 or 20 or 25 mile ride that I went on but you know why Corey?
The reason I started doing that is because he was a higher calling, and I don’t so like last year I completed my first 50 mile stretch, and this year I’m going for 100 I’m like so amped up to do it. It’s not about endurance. It’s not about fitness. It’s about mine therapy to me. It’s when I’m on my bike. I’m the freest and I have a road bike with road handles. I cycle on the road. I do, you know pavement mainly. It’s about mine therapy. It’s a it’s a way for me to cope with the things that I have in my life and and the more I do it, the more I realized the release that it creates.
And in entrepreneurship, you have to have that because entrepreneurship is just a completely different beast. It’s unlike anything else that I’ve ever done. In fact, even to this day, my parents still say, why don’t you go get a full time job? And I’m like, well, what’s the fun in that? Like, I did that, you know, I got the salary. I got paid. And then I realized that you know what? There’s more to life than getting up in the morning struggling with a commute, barely making ends meet at the end of the day.
Why? So I can fulfill someone else’s dream. What about my dream? What about my wife? What about my purpose? And my Why is my family and so a lot of the things that you were talking about, I wanted to touch upon because a lot of entrepreneurs specifically don’t understand the intricacies of that. So mind, body and soul and soul is spirit. Truly from a faith standpoint is to have that inner peace. Now having those three things, you know, both of us in our in our day, we’ve heard guys like Andy Frisella and Ed Mylett talk about this.
And these are guys that have built fucking empires and talk about the importance of Mind, Body, soul, inner peace, God faith, exercise nutrition. So when you hear that from successful people it does to kind of ring in your mind and say, You know what, there’s a reason these guys are doing this. You know, there’s, there’s a huge benefit. It’s a, it’s an overall accomplishment for being the best human being that you can be. So I know that we kind of got off on a tangent.
You were talking about your past and, you know, being on your third marriage, but you know what, Cory? I think where you are today is probably the best spot in your life. You know, because you wouldn’t you wouldn’t be Hear, you know, there’s there’s a rhyme and reason for why things happen. And I think you are where you are today. Because those things were meant to happen. I think that as human beings as entrepreneurs, you know when havoc happens like right now this COVID-19 in this this virus, the whole world been on the fucking lockdown a lot of people, there’s two types of people. One is people are fearing, don’t get me wrong, I’ve got fear because I’ve got, you know, a wife who has an autoimmune disorder.
So I’m fearing, but on the flip side of that is people are looking at as an opportunity as an opportunity to pivot to change yourself to become a better version to rediscover yourself maybe or take on something new that you haven’t done before. Like they say where there’s a problem, there’s an opportunity. So I think that you are where you are today. Because you were meant to be here. You were meant to do what you’re doing to be coaching people to be sharing your story. And in fact, then you want to talk to someone, you know, when I talk to people like you that have had a really dark past, you know, whatever that might be, whether it’s divorce or drugs or homeless, even, you know, whatever a dark past, there’s something about adversity.
Tony Robbins says that adversity pushes us into action. So adversity is essential to growth. You know, it’s a lot of people don’t understand the rationale behind it. Because it doesn’t make sense. You’re supposed to struggle to win. Of course, you got to risk and sacrifice to gain something. It’s kind of like the poorest of analogies when two countries go to war.
Right? They don’t, I mean, they’re sacrificing people, but to have a tactical approach to it, right, how they’re gonna attack the opponent, the enemy, how they’re going to win the war. So let’s talk a little bit about so your dark past. You’ve gone through all these Things What are you doing these days to make you happy that gives you fulfillment that you know you’re helping create impact in the world in the lives of others
Corey Berrier [19:12]
having to be that was great thank you by the way, that was um, you hit on so many things that that I was like doing alright, that’s the next thing thing and then you just kept checking them off. So one thing that I really want to hit on really quick and they please circle me back around to the question is you said mind body and spirit.
I agree with you 100% the reason that we’re both here is because we’re cognizant of that now have we always been maybe not, but I just finished was so so on time that you said that because I just finished literally yesterday. a five day water fast. And so that is exactly what it sounds like. is five days with water. I had a cup of coffee in the morning. Have a cup of coffee in the afternoon. That’s it, jack, period.
Ivan Temelkov [20:04]
And here’s me thinking that I’m crazy doing intermittent fasting. You’re talking about a five.
Corey Berrier [20:09]
Oh my god, it was terrible. I know intermittent fasting before it. So that’s what I’m doing now. 12 to seven, what? How when do you fast? When is your?
Ivan Temelkov [20:18]
So I started doing this about eight months ago or so roughly. And so let me take you back to march of 2019. So after, probably close, so I was very active back in high school lifting weights. You know, I was benching almost 200 pounds when I was 185 pounds. I was squatting 300 pounds, you know, like I was in really good shape. Fast forward 20 years it would be start the gym, quit the gym, start the gym, quit the gym or start the gym, don’t go to the gym, pay gym fees for months and months and sometimes years.
And I’d be like, What the fuck are you doing? And so, March 2019 I said enough is enough. I started going to the gym, lost 25 pounds was eating better ditch my heartburn that I was getting from eating bad foods. And then about eight months ago, I started intermittent fasting. And the way this works is so in the morning, so about a half a day, I will fast every day. So my breakfast is a couple of cups of coffee, which is about 10 calories, roughly, if that depending on how many cups I have, or, you know, this big cup that I got over here, right? So that takes me through a half a day and I’m sticking to a 2000 calorie daily limit.
So and just being selective about what I eat, so half the day is I fast. Then I have a lunch and then I have a dinner. So I’m still doing the three ball two meals because I guess if you classify coffee as breakfast, right, because that’s actually a giant meal mess. You know growing up I was told that you need breakfast was The most important meal of the day, not the bullshit.
It’s not Oh shit. It’s total fucking bullshit. Exactly. And so it was a challenge for about two weeks when I started intermittent fasting because it was an adaptation period for my body. Let’s face it, nobody that I knew had done anything like this, let alone anyone in my family like nobody in my family even tried this. And so this was no, absolutely i mean, you got to remember I was raised on five course meals, eat as much as you want.
Eat fucking sugars, eat steak, eat fucking beef kebabs. I mean, if you haven’t been to Eastern Europe, and you have a chance to go look at the fucking menus and you’ll be like, how do these people not get heart attacks? So, to answer your question, I think intermittent fasting is probably one of the best things that I’ve done.
Corey Berrier [22:55]
Yeah, I mean, so you know, so I I now, I found From 12 to seven, but that was five days. It was interesting because I would love to tell you that it was a great experience. It was a great experience for the mind. It was great mental, great mental to I mean, like to get through five days you have to be somewhat mentally to be honest with you. It was great because my wife actually wrote me into doing this. If I’m being completely honest, she put me on the spot.
We were on a Zoom call with several other people and she somebody had brought up that they were doing fashion. Oh, yeah, jump on that. I’m like, don’t leave. Yeah, she was like, yeah, we’re Yeah, let’s, let’s, uh, we can do this. And I’m like, Okay, well, I’m not going to pitch out in front of everybody. So I was like, Okay, we’ll do it. We made a bet with everybody on the call. And which helps, I think. So my wife and I, you know, we help we kept each other accountable and in you know I think I just realized this Ivan it brought us closer together.
And and maybe that was because we didn’t spend all of our time cooking and cleaning and you know messing with food or at the grocery store or it’s amazing. The amount of hours you gain in a day without any, it’s, it’s almost unreal. It’s almost like you You always have so much time that you just don’t even know what else to do. It’s crazy. So mentally, it was really really good for both of us. I also mean I lost 13 pounds. I didn’t really it wasn’t necessary.
The certainly wasn’t necessarily the goal and, and but but I will say this, you know, for anybody who’s trying to lose weight, you certainly don’t want to jump into this. Okay, I’m going to tell you that right now. You do not want to jump into it, but like you do. I’ve been like I do now. The intermittent fasting Just like I said I did before, which I think prepared me for this a little bit better. Plus, I’m like you, I’m over 40. So, I’ve had a colonoscopy.
So, you know, I’ve had to fast for 24 hours, right? Um, so I had a little bit of a jumpstart that I just had to get through the rest of the four days. But man, you the mental toughness through this was, was the best thing that could have ever come out of this. And, you know, in here, you know, I get to tell you about this, this experience, and maybe somebody here listening will say, you know, maybe this is something that I can do because this guy did it. And I’m a guy from Mayberry.
Look, I’m no, like, I’m not gonna say I’m a nobody, but like, I’m just a guy from Mayberry, dude, I’m just a regular fucking dude, period.
Ivan Temelkov [25:49]
Well, you know, a couple of things that you mentioned that I wanted to touch upon there as So you said, with the colonoscopy and having to fast for 24 hours. A lot of entrepreneurs specifically are in this mindset that it’s not that they’re incapable of doing something. It’s, it’s that they’re unwilling to do it. There’s a drastic difference in saying that, no, I can’t fast, or I won’t fast.
Because I’ve never fasted before. Personally until I started doing this eight months ago, and I haven’t gone back on it. Honestly, in fact, they used to have one day per week, that was a refeed day, but then I completely ditched it because I wanted to get even more aggressive with it and my body had adapted to it. But when I started doing this in the first two weeks, you go through a transition, and that’s with anything really not just nutrition, or exercise, or life or business.
It’s all of it. You go through a transition when if you haven’t done something and you’re doing it for the first time. There your mind plays tricks on. It tries to trick you into thinking that I can’t do this, because that’s how I felt in the first two weeks when I started intermittent fasting. I can’t do this. I’m hungry. My stomach is making noises. With that you have to push through that pain. You have to that’s like with anything you have to push. And in fact, they use that same analogy nowadays.
Corey Berrier [27:30]
Like two days ago.
Ivan Temelkov [27:31]
Since now we’re at home with this Coronavirus thing and I can’t go to the gym. You know, I don’t have an at home gym. I mean, I have space to exercise, but I don’t have it at home gym. So what’s my alternative? So I had to get creative, right? So two o’clock rolls around. I’m getting groggy and tired because I’m already spent, you know, like today, three meetings and three o’clock is gonna roll around and the only fucking thing I’ll want is a 20 minute nap.
That’s probably going to happen by three o’clock and that’s what happened two days ago is I said, You know what, get the fuck up off the chair. Go and do some push ups, do some air squats, do some chair dips and get the blood flowing. That’s just sick. You’ll have to push yourself. People don’t understand that in order to separate yourself from the herd. So you’re not labeled normal and mediocre. You have to do something different that other people are not doing it.
And when I was younger, and being bullied all through high school, I thought different was bad. It’s not that I was incapable I thought different was bad. This is why I didn’t try out for the football team. Know what, I probably would have been a really good football player in trial for the basketball team. I fucking love basketball for majority of my life. You know what? tennis team. I fucking love tennis. I could have played it.
So My biggest regrets have been nowadays, I catch myself I’m more subconscious about is that is it because I won’t, or I can’t drastic difference. If you can’t, you’re physically and mentally incapable I will tell you this. science shows that the human mind and humans are the most sophisticated beings, orgasms, things, objects in the universe.
So to say that you can’t do something is complete fucking bullshit. So the alternative is, you won’t do it. You won’t do it. Because you’re looking for validation. You won’t do it because you’re, you’re afraid you’re gonna fail. You won’t do it because you’re looking for instant gratification and whatever other lame ass reasons that people put on there, that that right there is pushing yourself to the next level.
So what’s gonna help you evolve as a person as an entrepreneur, as a business owner? I mean, us both being an Arete we’ve seen this, and 400-500 million Empire. Andy Frisella, Gary Vaynerchuk, Grant Cardone and whoever else we want to name in the fucking entrepreneurial world that has achieved something monumental, something that’s extraordinary from what society is doing.
So when you were talking about, you know, some of these things, I wanted to talk about the difference between can’t or won’t, because that’s where a lot of people struggle, think about is like, okay, a week ago, and I’ll just round it out with this a week ago. I actually did 100 pushups, 50, air squats and 30 chair depths in 45 minutes. I felt like Well, whatever probably feels like being run over by a semi. The next day, I could not walk.
And I even took some hands afterwards, post my workout I took supplements because you have to nourish your muscles. And I tend to fail with that afterwards because it’s pre and post right? The next day I shit you not, I could not walk down the steps. Because I was hurting so bad. But you know what? I thought about that I said to myself, it’s not because you couldn’t do it.
Because that’s what you thought when you started out. In fact, I recorded an entire video about it. It’s out on my social medias of actually me doing the work. And when I started it, I was like, Ivan, you can’t do 100 pushups. No, it’s not that you can’t do it. It’s that you won’t do it because you’re unwilling to try.
Corey Berrier [31:54]
That’s right. And that’s so important what you just said on wheeling. Try in that I think Ivan, I apologize for cutting you off. But a that is though, I hate that. It drives me absolutely insane, which, you know, I wouldn’t think I did two things. One, I’m also doing 75 hard. So I’m sure your listeners know what 70 found hardy is by now. So we kept that up, dude.
We kept that up throughout this whole thing. And he talks about a struggle brother 5am walks struggle bus. So the other thing that I was going to say is that you asked me when you mentioned something about when do I feel the most alive or something along those lines or when do I feel the most fulfilled? And if I’m being totally honest, is when I’m doing a podcast or when I you know, I host successful life podcast in hmm and I started It very similar I so strange because you and I tried to link up months ago.
But, uh, you know, it’s so strange because our our thought process is almost identical when it comes to a podcast you’re going to see minor like 13 times longer because just really, I write I shoot to shoot with people, whatever the case may be anyway. Yep. Um, but that’s when I feel the best I’ve and that’s when I feel the most alive and I don’t know what it is about it because I will tell you I wasn’t an RT member until October when I went to St. Louis. Y
eah. And I need to tell you, you need to tell you about two experiences that are super important to my life. And I would be doing you a disservice by not telling you first, on October 1 of 17. I started I sold my personal training company, and I started a hormone replacement clinic. What I mean by that is testosterone growth hormone, HCG weight loss. Botox. Juvederm is a basically medical spa with testosterone, right? We had laser hair removal and everything.
It was crazy. Um, but we were, we were a bit ahead of our time, I think where we are, and things did not go great. So I sold my part of it in October, technically, this is what happened. October 1, my partner, my business partner, my 5050 partner walks into my office, they keep in mind, I’m the one that ran the business. He didn’t do anything but funded. And he didn’t fund it entirely. He funded most of it. Um, but, but he said, he said, I’m not going to pay anymore.
And I’m like, okay, like, what does that What does that even mean? Like, you’re not gonna pay me anymore? Like I’m your business partner. What do you We can’t just walk in and say you’re not going to pay I run the whole business. Like without me, you know? Nothing about what’s going on here. And so that was a decision he made. And I’ll tell you why in a moment. Um, the most important thing about that day was I was supposed to buy my ticket to go see Tony Robbins that day.
And, and so that was a, that was a day that I was looking forward to since I started this journey, because I knew I journaled about it. Um, I knew I was going to this event, Ivan, I knew it was I knew I was I had already written it down more every day, I wrote in my journal, listen to Tony Robbins two hours a day and this is when I was really getting into this. And, and when my when my partner told me that it just ripped my heart out.
And, and so three or four days passed, I was still at work because I’ve still own half the company. So I called and she said, I need you to go to your computer, and I said, Okay, I need to say quiet That was actually pretty busy. But long story short suggested you to open your computer and she had made a deal with Tony Robbins research and and gotten me a VIP ticket to that show.
Oh wow. But to the up W and and I’ve been you know, people don’t you know I don’t have I can only I can’t even count how many times people have made me feel that way by doing something so kind and so generous and and knowing it was a time when we just lost our income literally. Yeah. And and then the second thing was was in was in October, but I guess it was a little bit before October October 2019 when I went to the Arete Live.
I went with Chris Saunders, Kristen Lee and Saunders on I had you’ll love this story because I I had mentioned To my wife and I said, Hey, I think the live tickets have gone on sale. And really it was somebody in the in in the accelerator had posted that the accelerator had tickets, right. Yeah. And so she said, Well, you know, we have let’s calculate everything up and you know, kind of see if it fits in the budget because at this point, I’m still I’m.
I’m coaching a little bit, I’m not coaching a ton. I’ve coached a shit ton of people, but I’m just trying to figure out exactly which path I want to be on. Um, and so that wasn’t the point of the story. I apologize kind of got off track there. Um so so I had said that to my wife, and in my thought process was I’m going one way or the other in my in my mind because not not defiant, not in a defiant way, meaning I already knew I was going to the event.
I just didn’t know how I was going to get They’re right. You know, so 30 seconds later I get a FaceTime. I haven’t I done FaceTime. I mean, I got on FaceTime with anybody. So I thought, well, this is like a butt dial or something, I’m sure. So I didn’t answer it. Um, and she said, my wife said to me about 3045 seconds later, she said, Hey, you need to call the FaceTime that might. That’s kind of odd, but okay. And it was Leanne Saunders and Leanne.
Um, you know, Leanne asked me to be their guest to the live event, and I get a little bit shaky shaken up, because, yeah, it was such a it was another one of those moments like what my wife did, you know, um, it was just such an important part of my life and And that’s how I started. The podcast is I I had the podcast was not really even a podcast before I went. And I saw Ryan Williams the day I was leaving. Brian, such a good guy.
And, you know, I got, I was talking to him because he was a syndicate member. And, you know, um, and I just said, Hey, do you would you like to be a guest on my podcast? He said absolutely. Whenever, so let me know. And I was like, Fuck, okay, like, what? Like, what the fuck am I gonna do now? Because I’ve, I’ve already looked into this. I don’t know how to do it. Mike’s been sitting on my desk for three three months. I’m literally I’m so sorry.
Ryan was my first guest and it’s been the most fulfilling thing I’ve ever done. I am so I guess you could say I’m so proud of myself for really driving in and figuring this thing out and getting so much gratification out of just interviewing people like you and hearing their stories. It’s so, so amazing to me. You know.
Ivan Temelkov [40:17]
a couple of things on what you were just mentioning, that I wanted to touch upon is, I think a lot of people don’t understand of how much opportunity there is out there, simply because they have lived in a limited mindset. I know this is particularly true for me because and someone actually reminded to me this, this recently said, you know, you you you move to a different country, in a move to a state or a city, you move to a different country.
So there was a cultural barrier. And I think to some aspect, there still is, but I think for most people, this is also equally true that most People think in a very limited mindset because of the society that we live in. Because if you think about it society, from the day you were born, dictates what you should be doing. The way that you should survive, everything is almost kind of like buy a book that you should be following.
You know, going to school, getting your education, getting a job, saving some money, maybe getting married, having kids, like, all the traditional things. So anytime you fall off the rails, and let’s say the rails are, you know, the train of life that’s on these rails, anytime you veer off, you’re seen as abnormal. you’re seen as unconventional. And I think that in what you were saying, I think it’s important to that’s why I wanted to elaborate upon this is the fact that most people live in a limited mindset, because largely because of what society has told them to do.
So example for that is, you want to start your own thing. You want to start you started a podcast, right? Well, society says, podcast does don’t pay podcast take a long time, you know, to build up podcasts is not part of the plan that society has for you. So, in a limited mindset, your brain immediately starts thinking, well, I can’t do this. You start to deviate from the willpower that you once had.
And honestly, this is why a vast majority of people never do the things that they wanted to do, because they have been dictated by society to do certain things, and therefore have embraced the limited mindset Now, if you look at history, and not even entrepreneurship, not even modern business, not even COVID-19 right now is any president, any influence or any spiritual leader, anyone that has made an impact in the world, the world once sought, sought as a rebel. Right?
Corey Berrier [43:26]
Right. Oh, yeah.
Ivan Temelkov [43:27]
That because that is how society portrays you, because you’re abnormal, you’re unconventional. You’re not doing what society wants you to do. And, I mean, I will give you a prime example. You know, of a situation. So, seven, eight years ago, I was working still in the agency world towards the tail end, and was working for an agency here in St. Louis. And mind you that this was an agency that I devoted a lot of time To help them grow.
I mean, these days they’re doing, you know, $15-$20 million in revenue, roughly. And so long story short, you know, about six months ago, I’d still been in touch, you know, with the owner over Facebook and he had a situation that happened, you know, and what’s what’s really interesting about that is this that he reached out to me, because I was one of the only people that were willing to listen about the situation.
Nobody else gave a shit. You know, the rest of the world didn’t give a shit. So the reason I’m sharing this is this that way you become exceptional is in part by being unconventional by doing other things that nobody else is doing. And so and I think that’s very important now with with what’s happening with the world being on a lockdown, this is more important than ever.
Because I think creative minds will emerge from this, I think people are going to reinvent themselves. I think people are going to influence the world in a different way. I think there’s going to be a much bigger sense of gratitude that will emerge out of this. Because in the history of mankind, at least for a very long time, we have never had this kind of situation.
So, in essence, what you know what you’re doing in the way you’re impacting the lives of others, there’s going to be a huge, huge, huge reciprocation and not necessarily monetary one. And there might even be, but most importantly, they’ll be an influential impact in terms of the lives of others. And honestly, that’s the biggest thing because if you don’t, if your life is not influenced mind, body and soul, you can’t do anything else.
And that’s what people don’t understand that it’s you know, it’s funny that When you watch minds like motivational, inspirational stuff, most people are like this a bunch of bullshit. Right? Most people, most people, yeah, because most our society most are mediocre most don’t see value
Corey Berrier [46:16]
in that because they never took initiative. And that’s why they’re in the most category.
Ivan Temelkov [46:24]
Exactly. That’s why they’re in the most category. Cory this this podcast episode could literally go endlessly and you know, I just want to round things off with you know, how can people connect with you out there, you know, what’s the best way to reach you? To be honest right
Corey Berrier [46:43]
now, is IG is where I’m primarily you could just follow me at @coreyberrier. You can pronounce that Berrier or if you want to be really fucking fancy, you Barry
Ivan Temelkov [47:02]
that’s awesome, man. That’s awesome.
Corey Berrier [47:04]
I guess for me. For me Barrier is Berrier.
Ivan Temelkov [47:08]
Okay, okay. I want to thank you for jumping on, you know, this was a really great conversation.